It's been a while...

So I just realized it's been three and a half months since my last blog. That's quite a long time and I apologize to all those who have been following me since I started this blog. There is never really an excuse not to blog, but I have been going through a tough time, as some of you may know.

As some of you read on my last post, my grandfather was pretty sick. Unfortunately a couple of weeks after I posted my last update, my grandfather passed away. I have never experienced such a heart breaking moment in my entire life. I felt numb and didn't think my life would ever be the same. My grandfather was the biggest supporter of me. He wanted to see me succeed, and the moment he was gone the biggest regret I had was that he would never be able to see me do the one thing he always wanted me to do, lose weight and be happy.

After months of being on Jenny Craig, struggling through the learning process of what I could and could not do. Learning that I could be emotional and not eat those away... I fell of the wagon, hard.

I cannot make excuses for what I did. True, I suffered a huge blow to my emotions and to my life. Losing my grandfather will always be a big part of my life. But in hindsight, there are so many things I would have done differently. I would not have let the week that followed his passing effect me the way that I did. Everything that happened that week wasn't worth what I finally gained back in weight. But I did let it get to me, and some days I still get upset over what transpired.

But I am here today to let all of you know that I am back on the program. I am back to losing weight, and I have so many plans for myself and I am hoping you'll stick with me here.

There is a lot I want to tell all of you here about the last several months... and I will, little by little, as I post more blogs. But the biggest thing I wanted to get out of the way is gone.

I did lost my grandfather on May 6, 2012. That date will never be the same to me. But I wont let it be a negative weight on my shoulders. I will honor my grandfather wishes and his memory by doing the one thing he always wanted me to do.

I love you Grandpa. I always have and always will. You were my hero. You were my King Triton. I hope I can do everything in my power to make you proud of me, always.